THE LAMP A Full Length Dark Comedy by John Monteleone CONTACT: e-mail: writing@johnmonteleone.com PO Box 2723 Sag Harbor, NY 11963 IMPORTANT NOTE REGARDING PRODUCTIONS STUDENT CLASS PROJECTS If this is for a student class project you may use this text or sections of it free of charge but I want to know that you're doing it for my resume and would love a video tape of the production, and/or quality rehearsals. PRODUCTIONS OF ANY KIND OR LEVEL You may read and use this text-based script for considering work but if you want to produce my work as a student, amateur or professional production you must purchase scripts from me online and pay royalties per performance. __________________________________ Copyright 1997 by John Monteleone All Rights Reserved Registered with WGAE CHARACTERS: DUDLEY Forty to Fifty. FIONA Forty to Fifty. BONNIE BOO Twenties. MR. CARNARO Thirty to Fifty. TIME: The present. PLACE: A living room in a wealthy home in the Hamptons, NY. THE SET: There are three wall units that are separated by dark space behind it symbolizing a room. The walls are high and clean, as if they were part of large, high room that was once extravagantly decorated, but is now more destitute than elegant. There are a number of large boxes, some with open tops each marked with a label: dishes, antiques, books, etc., many small, decorative items such as expensive lamps, ashtrays, a wine rack with wine in it, a white, expensive sofa, a chair, a small table with a half finished bottle of Chevis Regal, two glasses and perhaps an ice bucket on it. PRE SET: In addition to the wealthy, contemporary home, there must be lighting that suggests the primitive living underneath this facade. Primitive Jungle Music will play as the audience enters. ACT ONE Scene One (Fiona and Dudley) The primitive Jungle Music fades out. Lights rise on Fiona and Dudley. She’s pacing, he’s sitting and rubbing his forehead, deeply frustrated. DUDLEY I need to talk, Fiona... FIONA ...I’m in a huff over the stupid mink situat... DUDLEY ...What we need to discuss, is the most important... FIONA ...Can you imagine ruining a four thousand dollar mink by using the wrong dry cleaning chemical? What's the world coming to? There's no respect for the living any... DUDLEY ..I need... FIONA ...The insurance will take weeks and I need my mink tomorrow, I won't feel natural going out of the house without Minky. Oh, Dudley, I’m completely ruined over this--people are so cruel and self-absorbed... You’d think that the idiot who had the responsibility to clean my four thousand dollar mink would have been careful--not on his pathetic, little, myopic life... Probably wanted to ruin it because he works in a dry cleaning store and we're wealth... DUDLEY ...were wealth... FIONA ...what was going through his mind? Where was he? Wrapped up in his own little delusional world..? DUDLEY ...FIONA! (Softly) Fiona... I have something personal to say to you. Something we share mutually. Care deeply for, and both have to discuss. Pause. They look at one another. FIONA Tomorrow's the meeting with my sister for her wedding and I'm going to show up in a leather jacket that's wrinkled and gruffy and tired like this mundane relationship... DUDLEY ...There's... FIONA ...Oh, I'll never see that mink again. Never. Never never ev... DUDLEY ...the... insurance... will... cover... FIONA ...I'll believe it when the check clears... DUDLEY (screams) ...I HAVE TO TELL YOU SOMETHING! FIONA I'm not deaf! DUDLEY Sit down. FIONA I need to move around. Pause. DUDLEY We have to sell the... FIONA ...Don't interrupt me when I'm trying to finish a... DUDLEY ...I thought you were fin... FIONA ...Now you're reading my min..? DUDLEY ...I was trying to speak but YOU interr... FIONA ...I hadn't finished my thought and you... DUDLEY ...I... FIONA ...need to borrow some mon... DUDLEY ...we’re bro... FIONA ...I need to buy a new dress for the wedding. My beloved sis... DUDLEY ...you detest your... FIONA ...she's done in--and yes, we know how you feel about weddings- -it's an historical proclamation of our relationship... He opens his mouth to interrupt. FIONA ...and yes, we know the story: "She's not religious, she not Christian, she's anything but a virgin and there she'll be strutting herself on the alter before a priest she's having a hot sexual fantasy over in a church she doesn't support smiling away in front of a bunch of teary-eyed relatives who hate one another and who she detests... He opens his mouth to interrupt. FIONA ...annnnnnd yes, her wedding dress should be in black leathers, chains and handcuffs, a full black leather face mask and a whip doused in blood... But... it's her moment, I am her family and obligated to support her delusions of purity... He opens his mouth to interrupt. FIONA ...and, to do that, I have to go to the wedding. I can't go to the wedding without a new dress in the pinkishly pure colors of her choice--it wouldn't be right. It wouldn't be proper. It would be wrong. She stares at him, he weakens. DUDLEY How much do you need? Pause. FIONA Two. Pause. DUDLEY Two? FIONA Just two. DUDLEY Hundred or thousand? FIONA Ten hundred. DUDLEY Ten, hundred? FIONA Twice. DUDLEY TWO GRAND FOR A..? FIONA ...We still have an obligation to keep face. Do you want me to be wearing a fifty dollar Caldor dress and step out of a Jaguar? Wouldn't that be enviable. We are doing badly enough as it is. No money left because of your business wizardry. They’re foreclosing on our house and everything in it... Still, we have to, at the very least, keep up appearances in order to maintain some profitability within the family. THINK on this you numskull: How would people treat us if they knew we were devastated..? DUDLEY ...They'd probably want to hel... FIONA ...We'd be abandoned because we were destitute, and that's a rather credit-less place to park your bare tushy... Pause. They look at one another. FIONA ...The dress is an investment in our survival, and hence, a necessity. We are a team, after all. Pause. They look at one another. FIONA When can you write me a check? Pause. DUDLEY Would you like a drink? FIONA ICE. He fixes two drinks in the silence. He brings one to her. DUDLEY I can't loan you any money because I... FIONA ...It's that self-destructive streak in you that somehow wants to kill this family off and I can't trust you. Because I can't trust you, I can't fuck you anymore. DUDLEY It's been seven ye... FIONA ...Did you have something you wanted to..? DUDLEY ...IT’S BEEN SEVEN YE... FIONA ...I'M WASN'T FINISHED WITH ... MY... SENT... DUDLEY ...YOU WON'T LET ME SPEAK BECAUSE I FINALLY OWNED UP TO THE TRUTH OF MY MISERABLY EXISTENCE AND THIS MARRIAGE, AND GAVE UP ALL THE ORNAMENTATION IN A SICKENING AND FUTILE ATTEMPT AT FINDING MYSELF--SO INSTEAD OF LISTENING YOU INTERRUPT ME TO KEEP YOURSELF LIVING IN A LONG-WINDED FANTASY SUPPORTING MEANINGLESS THINGS WHICH SURROUND AND VALIDATE YOUR WORTHLESS, SPIRITUALLY CASTRATING, VEHEMENTLY MALICIOUS, OBNOXIOUSLY NARCISSISTIC, OSTENTATIOUS SELF-ABSORBED LIFESTYLE THAT HAS, IS AND WILL CONTINUE TO SUCK MY LIFE-BLOOD DRY LIKE THE SHREW IN HEAT THAT YOU ARRRRREEEEEE!!! Pause. Fiona calmly peering into an imaginary mirror looks out toward the audience. DUDLEY (meekly) Let me explain... FIONA (very quietly as she puts on make-up) I didn't hear a word you said because you were acting like Hitler again and you didn't let me finish my tho... DUDLEY ...I can't bear this... FIONA ...no one listens. No one hears. I'm beginning to believe conversation is a synonym for war... DUDLEY ...we... have... to... sell... the... FIONA ...why can't we have a normal discussion like normal peop..? DUDLEY ...because you don't list... FIONA ...about real things. Things that mean something. Conversations and discu... DUDLEY ...we have conversat... FIONA ...whe..? DUDLEY ...we're having one righ... FIONA ...oh plea... DUDLEY ...let's try to talk to one another and respect the other persons point of view. Pause. They look at one another. FIONA You're not going to give me the money, are you? That's what "respect the other persons point of view" meant, didn't it? I know your language. I know the secret codes--MANIPULATOR! Living here is like being in an upside down roller-coaster going a million miles an hour--that's what trying to communicate does to me in this age of deaf ears, HUGE egos, small minds and big mouths. Pause. DUDLEY Another drink? FIONA Hurry. He fixes two drinks in the silence. He brings one to her. DUDLEY It’s very important. FIONA (deeply concerned) Speak softly. I've grown into a piece of brittle glass living under your regime. Pause. They gaze into one anothers eyes, terrified. DUDLEY ...We... have... to... sell... the... FIONA ...Wait.. Sitting, she grasps the chair and braces herself. FIONA Go. DUDLEY (whispers) Jaguar! FIONA ...Oh oh oh oh oh.... DUDLEY ...I'm sorry, I should have been more gentle... FIONA ...Oh oh oh oh oh... DUDLEY (helping her up) ...Perhaps after a bottle of Don Perrignon... FIONA ...Oh my God--not my Jaggy. DUDLEY I'm sorry. There is no other way. It's a matter of survival. FIONA It's all gone. POOF! I'm on the edge of my cliff--why don't I just jump there’s nothing left! DUDLEY We have each other. She topples over. DUDLEY I've killed her. FIONA (in a waking delirium on the floor) No no no no no no no no. NO! NO! NO I WON’T HAVE IT. (pause. Looks out) Jaggy and I have a special relationship. One that keeps me going in all this hatred. A special human connection. He has a way with me that I can't describe. I feel close to him, he knows my moves, and I his, I can't quite describe it... it's... spontaneous... it's as if he were a living being, a part of me, and I, him. It's... carnal. DUDLEY Dear God, we’ve become completely pathetic. He helps her sit up again. FIONA Keep the mink, keep the dress, keep the house, keep yourself but give me my Jaggy--I need another drink quickly QUICKLY! He fixes two more drinks. They Gulp them down. The bottle of booze is empty and in clear sight. They both sit solemnly, looking into their large, empty glasses. DUDLEY (incredibly nervous) I've let you down. If I had only been more macho, not let my true feelings emerge, not tried to face the truth and change... this would have never happened. I've... failed. FIONA Yes, you have. You had a responsibility to not face all that nonsense. It was a moronic, sadistic, masochistic, childish, pathetic failure. You are a horrendous excuse for a male, a businessman, and a human being. (pause) But we have to let go of the past... DUDLEY ...Perhaps we can't but who'd ever want to admit that?! FIONA (as if he hadn't spoken) I couldn't bear looking into that driveway and not seeing him there. In some miraculous way, I wish he could come to life, like... Pinnochio. NO! YOU CAN'T SELL HIM YOU HEAR ME YOU CAN'T TOUCH MY JAGGY OR I'LL... She grabs him by the neck. DUDLEY WHAT DO YOU WANT ME TO DO, THEY'RE COMING TO REPOSSESS HIM? THOSE BASTAAAAAAAAAARDS. They stop fighting. FIONA (to Dudley) THOSE BASTAAAAAAAAAAAAAARDS! DUDLEY AND FIONA (to each other) THOSE BASTAAAAAAAAAAAAAARDS! FIONA IT'S THE PRESIDENT! DUDLEY THE CATHOLICS! FIONA THE JEWS! DUDLEY THE BLACKS! FIONA THE WHITES! DUDLEY THE PURPLES! FIONA OUR MOTHERS! DUDLEY OUR FATHERS! FIONA GOD! DUDLEY IF HE HAD THE GUTS TO REALLY EXIST! FIONA AND DUDLEY (accusing each other) IT'S YOU!!! She turns sharply to him. FIONA How much do we owe? DUDLEY I... She falls to her knees, grabs him by his balls with both hands. FIONA ...HOW MUCH? DUDLEY A LOT... FIONA ...I'LL DO A BOBBIT!!! DUDLEY (groaning in pain) ...WE DON'T HAVE ANY MORE MONEY LEFT. I HAD TO PAY OFF THE MORTGAGE AND BUSINESS DEBTS AND OUR BELOVED DAUGHTERS... She releases his balls, he falls to his knees in agony, she looks at her hands in disgust, crosses down to the edge of the stage, and looks out over the audience. FIONA (ruined, deep voice) I feel as though I've just been told I have cellulite, I need another nose job, my face lift is deteriorating again, the tummy tuck didn't hold and I've reached my liposuction limit!? I don’t deserve this. I simply won’t accept it. DUDLEY Yes you will. We both will. FIONA (deepening delusion) ...Jaggy and I will run away. Go to Europe perhaps or the Virgin Islands. We'll sail together on ferry's from one exotic Island to another. We'll stop at Pizza Huts and Burger Kings and eat Whoppers along the coastline, and I'll go for a nice swim and Jaggy will wait for me drenched in the Caribbean sunset. DUDLEY (wobbling to his feet, in agony) Look... please... listen to me. Just this morning, I too was remembering his plush bucket seats made of pure imported de- blooded white baby seal hide, the dashboard coated with Baluka Whale skin and his genuine Dolphin-eye shift handle, and I know that he's THERE for us. He LOVES us. He WANTS to be sold to save our lives from bankruptcy. Let me sell him. Please let me sell him. FIONA My God. He's the only nice thing we have left to show that we've done... (she searches for the word) ...what's the word? DUDLEY Something? FIONA Yes. Something... with our lives. DUDLEY (growing anger) Something else... FIONA ...Life without Jaggy..? DUDLEY (angry) ...Something besides this... FIONA This is what the Bible meant by Apocalypse--I finally feel religious. (smiles) Very calmly, she moves to the mirror and fixes her hair and make-up facing out toward the audience. DUDLEY The whole fabrication of my life makes me sick. That's why I gave up on myself, on us, and let the business perish. That's why I've had affairs behind your back. That's why I want to kill JAGGER--because he's your secret metal lover. It’s not the money. It’s his shaft. AND I HATE HIM FOR IT. I HATE HIM! And it’s made me wish DEATH ON YOU--YOU BITCH! Pause. They look at one another for a long, awkward moment. DUDLEY Let me explain... FIONA (simply and sincerely) I cannot trust you. How can I fuck someone who I cannot trust? How do I know who you're fucking, in your mind, while you're fucking me? I need to be fucked, sincerely. Fucked, from the heart. Fucked, with devotion. Fucked, with care. I need to feel some real connection while you're dick is inside my pussy, other than your dick inside my pussy. I need to know that when you fuck me, you really are fucking me because you love ME, not just because its natural, necessary, essential and important, or you need it desperately and it feels good. DUDLEY You used passive aggression to get back at all the pain I’ve caused you... FIONA ...It's different for a woman. The man is entering her. Trust is essential... DUDLEY ...and putting your dick in someone's mouth is “safe haven”..?! Pause. Her back is to him now as she has drifted off in a daze. Dudley puts his head down. FIONA ...You want to hear something funny? (pushed laughter) ...I was looking at you while you were trying to devastate me to get your way, as usual, and your funny little ugly dry mouth was moving in its vicious attacking little insignificant twitch, and I had this impossible thought: "We could get along." Isn't that odd? And in that inexpensive moment, I was actually experiencing, as if for the first time, our first kiss. Impossibly silly, isn't it? (pause) Our first kiss. Do you remember it? Dudley growls. FIONA Your lips, touching mine. I was lifted up into heaven. I felt like an angel. DUDLEY I don't remember it. FIONA Tell me you remember, before I slit my wrists. They look away from one another. DUDLEY It was a ... good kiss. FIONA (peering into her empty glass) Your lips touching mine. Both of us, never wanting them to part? DUDLEY If you say so... FIONA ...There is hope. Isn't there? DUDLEY No. She poses, holding a drink, like the young ingenue she was when they first met. FIONA You'd of thought a moment ago all we had left between us was the gift of mutual manipulation. And now look at us. Like two hopeful teenagers sitting by a moonlit pond mid-summer in the sixties. In "Father Knows Best Country". Under the hypnosis of Hallmark and LSD. She giggles. He nods sadly. FIONA (smiling) I'm going to begin looking forward to something again. Soon. Very soon. When I have the strength. You'll see. Good times are about to happen--I can feel it. DUDLEY (peering into his empty glass) Fulfillment's a good idea. FIONA We need to stay together in this. We are a family. Pause. DUDLEY What do you need me to say to you this time, Fiona? FIONA (giggles) Tell me when I'll be alive again. I could use a good Joke. Pause. DUDLEY (almost asleep on the couch) In the morning...perhaps? Pause. She sits next to him. FIONA (sweetly smiling. Gently) Yes. In the morning. You will show me you love me? You'll write me a check. DUDLEY (nodding off) After I've rested, maybe I'll have the strength. FIONA We have to go on. Don't we? DUDLEY (almost asleep) No. FIONA For Bonnie Boo, our precious infant. Our baby. (drowsy) Our little miracle. Our pride and joy. Our little girl in pink booties and pigtails. (eyes closed) Who played in the sand pile and blew bubbles on the living room floor. Who said Mummy and Duddy to us. We must go on for her. Mustn’t we? DUDLEY (asleep) No... He snores. She falls asleep. A moment of silence. Lights fade to black. End of Act One Scene One ACT ONE Scene Two (Bonnie Boo) In the dark, very loud Rapp Music begins. The lights rise on Bonnie Boo dancing to the Rapp rhythm coming from a large, portable CD player on the table. Bonnie Boo is in her twenties and is dressed in bold, mis-matching colors reminiscent of Punk-Rock, but very contemporary as well. Her hair is half bald, half red, partially purple, etc. She wears black, high leather boots with silver studs on them and assorted leathers and studs on her legs, arms, waist, etc. Her arms and legs are bare. She has earrings pierced through almost every part of her. Large, long, small, etc. There is one huge ring, that extends from one side of her head to the other seeming to go through her brain. It is thick and gold and doesn't budge. Fiona and Dudley sit on the couch awake and staring at Bonnie Boo in complete disbelief. BONNIE BOO (dancing to the Rapp music) I can't find no love no where I look in a man on TV in a penis or a book So I put holes everywhere fillin' my un-loved self up in my face in my nose in my cliter-ous I'm so angry I could scream but I ain't really mean to my Mummy or my Duddy or with sexual whip cream Ugk Ugk Ugk Ugk Ugk Ugk Ugk Ugk Ugk! Bonnie Boo continues dancing to the music blasting out of her portable CD player on the table. Dudley falls unconscious as if he were hit in the face with a sledge hammer. Fiona rises and looks as if she were going to vomit. She tries to smile. FIONA (trying to cope) Bonnie Boo? You're... home. What a nice surprise... Let me look at you. Fiona snaps the CD Player off. BONNIE BOO (upbeat falsely happy, neurotic rhythm--as soon as the radio snaps off) I can't seem to find anything that reminds me of who I thought I was going to be. Everyone had this hope when I was incubating in the Great Infected American Uterus, to become something. So I ran after this empty image thing I was supposed to be, other than who I already was. And the whole world collapsed around me. I didn't let anyone know that it was all falling apart, that inside I felt like Pompeii. What does shrinko call my condition--my inner... (right to her parents) ...FUCKED-UPED-NESS! She begins to happily prepare a cocaine injection, neatly laying out supplies on the table. FIONA You look... uh... How's school? (to Dudley) Sweetheart? Honey? Fiona belts Dudley in the head who wakes up. DUDLEY (waking from a bad dream) MOI? MOI? I’LL PAY I’LL PAY DON’T HURT ME... Dudley stands, pulls himself together, and looks at Bonnie Boo who keeps with the cocaine preparation. BONNIE BOO Of course, it's not school that's so delirious, it's not my insane, hyperventilated group of friends or the fact that Fiona and Dudley never paid any attention to me because they had such unfulfilled lives and resented me for having fucked-up one night--poignant pun and alliteration intended... (sing song) ...LIT OO1A (speaking) ...it's more a "feeling", really, that I can't seem to escape from. FIONA She's so talkative. I remember when she was quiet as a dove. When she was one! DUDLEY Look how she's... grown, Fiona. So... full of leather and-- where did you get those rings? There must be a thous... BONNIE BOO (to them) ...Dudley always used that expression--MOI--it's so cute--no joke. Like I want to barf every time I hear him grunt it out. He's from the sixties, did like a brief stint in, LSD, you know the usual sixties bullshit, then became an asshole like the rest of the shitheads who wouldn't let the sixties exist.. like those nice folk, parents grew up on the farm and they went into politics and assassinated Janis Joplin, Jimmy Hendrix, Van Morrison, John Lennon, Martin Luther King, Malcolm X, John and Bobby Kennedy, and all of us with them... created conspiracy's, lied to everyone even themselves and held up the image of the American Myth, like a mother holding porridge up to their sick child's face hoping they'll be good little pink babies again. They had passion. You know what that is? The feeling to want to express, to speak out, to say something important. Oooops, I'd better shut up... so like Dudley says, “Can't beat 'em, Join 'em... It’s good business”... he taught me a song that was popular back then: (she sings the tune from THE AGE OF AQUARIUS, with the following words) THIS IS THE DAWNING OF THE AGE OF MOI THE AGE OF MOI MOIAAAAAAAAAA MOI MOI MOI MOI! She searches for her tourniquet. BONNIE BOO It's not an actual feeling I was telling you about---it's more a feeling of... complete emptiness--feeling no feelings and wanting to feel feelings, sort of. Like, I have these holes in me--like definitely--is that a good way to put it? And have this need to be filled up--yeah, that could be it--definitely. See, I'm afraid that like, if I try to love someone, I’ll die, so I don't love anyone--NOOOOOOOOO Jooooooooooooke. And Fiona and Dudley--Poor babies, definitely both trapped in such money- -no fuckin’ jooooooooooooke. So who do you turn to? Yourself? Not! And who’s there? Who the fuck knows--not MOI. Dudley notices her cocaine materials neatly laid out on the table. DUDLEY Look at all this... paraphernalia... BONNIE BOO (sarcastically) I changed my major to Medicine--not. DUDLEY Did you hear that Fiona? Changed her major to “Medicine--not”. FIONA Now that is exciting. Finally, something positive. Bonnie Boo stands between her parents who are bent over, peering at her arm and each action that she does. DUDLEY She's demonstrating her education. I think we should watch. FIONA She's taking the white powder out of the bag. DUDLEY She's lighting a candle ceremoniously. FIONA She's putting the white powder into a spoon. DUDLEY She's holding the spoon over the flame. FIONA She's cooking the powder and it's bubbling up. FIONA Bubbling up. DUDLEY Bubbling up. FIONA She's huffing and puffing on the melted fluid. DUDLEY And picking up the thing-a-majiggy. FIONA She's taking the thingy and pouring it in. DUDLEY And pooooouuuuuring it in. FIONA And poooouuuuuuring it in. DUDLEY She's putting the stopper into the thingy. FIONA She's squirting the fluid onto my floor. DUDLEY She's putting a tourniquet around her arm. FIONA Pulling it tight. DUDLEY Pulling it tight. FIONA She's tapping and tapping... DUDLEY ...And tapping a vein. FIONA She's placing the needle on her flesh. DUDLEY And.... puuuuuushing the needle innnnn. Bonnie Boo looks at both her parents. BONNIE BOO I had a great ed-u-ca-tion. FIONA (pleasantly) Squeezing the thingy with her thumb. DUDLEY With her thumb. FIONA With her thumb. DUDLEY Rolling her eyes into the back of her head. FIONA How expertly she did that. BONNIE BOO Oh wow. DUDLEY Maybe she'll be a brain surgeon. BONNIE BOO Oh wow. FIONA And then she can operate on your brain... BONNIE BOO Oh wow. FIONA She'll be a plastic surgeon, then I'll never grow old. BONNIE BOO Oh WOW! DUDLEY Just plastic. BONNIE BOO OH FUCKIN' WOW! She jerks the needle out of her arm and blood begins to spurt out onto the rug in a stream looping up into the air and she begins designing abstract expressionist patterns on the floor and rug by moving her arm around. FIONA She’s getting blood all over the oriental? DUDLEY She is just a student Fiona. FIONA Oh oh oh oh oh... DUDLEY Was it something I said? FIONA Oh oh oh oh oh... Bonnie Boo laughs and falls gracefully onto the couch. DUDLEY Look Fi-Fi... She likes the new couch we just charged. BONNIE BOO They threw me out because Dudley and Fiona didn't pay THE TUITION BILL! FIONA I'm not cleaning up after her--I don't care how much free surgery she's worth. BONNIE BOO THEY THREW ME OUT BECAUSE I WASN'T RICH ANYMORE! (quietly) They threw me out. ...and this guy, FLIPPED OUT, it's a nickname, he's into like self-mutilation like he has this song, and it goes like this: (fast) LET'S GET MUTILATED LET'S GET MUTILATED LET'S GET MUTILATED LET'S GET MUTILATED Know what the fuck I mean, Mummy? Duddy? ..And like he's my guru sorta, and so like we have these cutting-edge parties--motto's BLEED FOR LIFE--no joke... Sprawled out on the couch, Bonnie Boo rocks and rolls to a silent Rapp, then turns and throws her legs over the back of the couch so that she is laying upside down. Fiona and Dudley look at their creation, horrified and smiling boldly. FIONA It's just a phase, that's all. You had long hair. DUDLEY You had sex with four guys at once in the woods. FIONA So did you. DUDLEY We can't accuse her while she's trying to find herself. FIONA It's perfectly natural. DUDLEY She's growing up. FIONA Exploring life. DUDLEY I'm not overly concerned. FIONA I don't want to misinterpret this psychologically. DUDLEY I'm afraid to interfere. FIONA It could destroy her sense of individuality. DUDLEY I agree completely. FIONA The Philips boy does the same thing. DUDLEY Just a sign of the times. FIONA Just a little phase. DUDLEY Like a gerbil up your ass. Pause. FIONA You're blaming me for this, aren't you? DUDLEY It wasn't me--I was never home. FIONA It wasn't me--I was out shopping. DUDLEY We were loving parents. FIONA Devoted. DUDLEY Concerned. FIONA Forthright. DUDLEY Emancipatorial. Pause. FIONA ...She went to private scho... DUDLEY ...Never wanted for clothes, a car, a stereo. FIONA ...Had her own room with a water view... FIONA & DUDLEY ...She had a horse...! FIONA ...Plenty of free time away from us... DUDLEY ...It’s unimaginable. It's not our fault she's like THAT! FIONA ...WE'VE FAILED. Dudley gets another drink. Bonnie Boo is still writhing on the couch in a delerium. Disgusted, Fiona turns back gazing out at her car. FIONA (to car) I love you... DUDLEY ...You haven't said that to me in... FIONA ...Jaggy... (to Dudley) Where are the keys. DUDLEY The keys. Um... Dudley searches for the keys. DUDLEY Why, I don't know, sweetheart... FIONA They're in your pocket I saw you put them there... give them to me. BONNIE BOO And then there's IAMBIC, he's the poet. And like every Friday night he's outside my window screaming at the top of his lungs: "WANNA DO SOME POETRY BITCH?" And I yell down from my balcony: "FUCK YEAH. BRING THE LUDES, DUDE." FIONA I'm going for a drive. Give me the keys. Now, before I become difficult. DUDLEY (showing her keys) Both sets... FIONA ...I want those... DUDLEY (to Bonnie Boo) ...Talk some sense into your mother... Fiona stalks Dudley throughout the room. Bonnie Boo speaks out toward the audience. FIONA Give them to me Dudley before I become neurotic! BONNIE BOO Wanna hear what Iambic thinks? I'll tell you in his language-- It's sooooooooooo romantic: (She rises and begins to speak like a stereotypical black teenager from the ghetto) So see sucker, like dis Damn I have dis memory inside like a dream I dream at night I’m in dis ship chains on my hands dig an’ da white master come in and starts parting the ladies legs and puttin’ it in hubby watches tied to the wall unfed see an’ little child they watch, too like the Turks did the Armenians, an’ the German’s did to the Jews, an’ the Catholics did to the UN-Catholics an’ the Palestinians did to the UN-Palestinians an’ the Indian’s did to the Indians like you do to each udder Lost wonderment In a sea of possibility... Do you dig? I do. (in her own voice) He’s a little radical about stuff, but hey, it’s a free country...I love him. But Fiona and Dudley wouldn't let me love a black man. Unless he was rich, because then, he'd be a white- black man.... see what I mean? (giggles, hurt) FIONA (chasing him) ...GIVE THEM TO ME... DUDLEY ...OVER MY DEAD BOD... Fiona dives and slides across the stage. Dudley jumps up and she slides under him. Dudley opens his mouth wide in profile and holds the keys over his open mouth, threatening to eat them. DUDLEY I'll eat them. FIONA Don't be ridiculous you'll get sick. DUDLEY I'M ALREADY SICK! STAY BACK! FIONA DON'T! She moves in. He swallows the huge set of keys. Then the second set. DUDLEY You're not going to wreck that one hundred and fifty two thousand seven hundred and twenty nine cent Jaguar. We need the mon... FIONA ...I hope you feel satisfied.. DUDLEY I feel like I ate... FIONA ...A CAR?! DUDLEY Wha'd I do? FIONA You swallowed a huge debt and it's going to rip out your heart. DUDLEY I swallowed them, for you. FIONA You swallowed them for yourself. He doubles over. Fiona looks at the scene and becomes terrified and disgusted. FIONA This isn’t happening. We live in the Hamptons for Chrissakes. We were friends with anyone who was anyone. We had parties with sushi and caviar and Patte' Patte' on light an' crunchy Wheat Thins. We went to all the Theatre events. DUDLEY Call 911! Dudley falls to the ground in a heap and begins crawling from the far end of the stage, on his belly, toward the phone at the other end of the stage. FIONA We worked for the company. We were legally unethical and dishonest. BONNIE BOO (in Iambic's street voice) Gotta have that white man's dream. Sewn in the constitution by the hand of the Fore-Gangsters. FIONA We created a nation as great as any founded by landlords and lawyers. BONNIE BOO (in Iambic's street voice) Everybody wants equality so long as they're rich. Dudley crawls onto the couch for a rest. DUDLEY CALL AN AM-BU..!!! He falls onto the floor and begins crawling on his belly again. BONNIE BOO (Iambic's voice) Wanna survive baby, gotta down the suit, take on white male characteristics, see. Walk like dis... She walks like a black pimp doing a white man. She almost steps over Dudley. Stops and looks at him, noticing him for the first time. DUDLEY ...Bleeding on the inside... BONNIE BOO (in Iambic's street voice, still walking) ...gotta join the very assholes ya tryin' to escape from.... DUDLEY ...Where no one can see... FIONA ...It hurts me so to watch you crawling on the floor like that. BONNIE BOO (looking at Dudley) Mummy? FIONA But it's how we live isn't it. Crawling toward salvation until we drop dead. BONNIE BOO What happened to Duddy? He crawls. Fiona drinks. FIONA (to Dudley) ...You should have been a poet we would have been a lot better off. Poetry and Pot in the woods. DUDLEY ...Phone... BONNIE BOO ...Call Mummy? FIONA ...I should have been a feminist instead of a Hippie... BONNIE BOO ...Mummy? FIONA ...I think that's what did me in. I never read Friedan, Damnit... BONNIE BOO ...MUMMY... DUDDY'S DYING..! FIONA ...I might of gotten divorced and found myself, instead of being abducted... DUDLEY ...Hospit... BONNIE BOO ...MUMMY CALL... FIONA ...It's all this stuff. We've become each others madness... BONNIE BOO ...I can't call... FIONA ...But what's the alternative? Love didn't work--who can trust it... BONNIE BOO ...I wish I could but I can't... FIONA ...War never solved anything except the national debt. What's left..? BONNIE BOO ...I need you to show me you care... FIONA ...I can't go back to beating a drum--the sixties are over, and besides, I wouldn't have a thing to wear, my credit cards are inactive... DUDLEY ... I'm dying... Pause. She looks at him terrified. FIONA ...Did you pay the life insurance? Dudley is almost to the phone. Fiona sees this and grabs the phone up and holds it over his head. He reaches up for it. Bonnie Boo watches from a distance and grows more terrified of what she is watching. FIONA ANSWER ME..? DUDLEY ...I need you... FIONA ...And I need you, too. DID YOU PAY THE LIFE INSURANCE..? DUDLEY ...Call the... Dudley gets a sudden burst of energy and begins pulling at the telephone wire from the floor like a wild animal who's got its feet in a trap. Fiona and Dudley have a tug of war, Dudley from the floor. DUDLEY ...I paid the life insurance and I did without. Fiona and Dudley fight. BONNIE BOO (terrified) No. Don't. Please don't... Fiona violently puts the telephone cord around Dudley's neck and holds him up on his knees, his back to her and he struggles for breath. BONNIE BOO Let him go. FIONA Don’t be ridiculous, he’ll retaliate. BONNIE BOO He’s gonna suffocate. FIONA We’re all used to that. And he’s in his natural environment right now--He’s comfortable, dear. BONNIE BOO He’s gonna die! FIONA Hmmm... yes, it seems that I’ve gotten myself into a... situation... and I don’t exactly know how to get myself out. Do you have any suggestions? BONNIE BOO LET HIM GO!!! FIONA That’s a very good idea. An idea that seems appropriate enough. The problem is, however, that letting him go would mean I lose control. Do you see what I mean? BONNIE BOO He’s turning blue. FIONA You don’t like that color, is that the problem? You like red? You want to bleed, dear, is that the new bent? It used to be robbery, then stealing cars, and jail. Why don’t you start looking at another way. This way. Control. Restraint. See how well he behaves. Watch. Fiona pulls the cord tight and walks Dudley like a dog. BONNIE BOO I’m this way because of that. FIONA Ridiculous idea. This is how I survive, dear. Do you see? GODAMNIT BONNIE BOO LOOK WHAT YOU’VE MADE ME DO. I'm ruining my mascara... Now if you don't do something nice for me, I'll strangle him. DO YOU HEAR ME? OBEY ME OR HE'S A DEAD MAN YOU LITTLE BITCH!!! Bonnie Boo pulls out a jack-knife and snaps it open. BONNIE BOO LET MY DADDY GO OR I’LL KILL YOU! FIONA You’ve learned your American history well I see. But, not political strategy, dear. Let me show you what I mean. Fiona pins Dudley with her foot. FIONA If you try and kill me, I’ll kill him. There we go, do you see that, my precious? Balance. How it all balances out. What goes up, must come down? Are you watching? BONNIE BOO Just ease him down. Bonnie Boo stands there with the knife held out at Fiona. FIONA I’ll make a deal with you. If you give me that knife, I’ll let him breathe. Bonnie Boo doesn't know what to do. BONNIE BOO Here. Bonnie Boo throws the knife to Fiona on the floor. Fiona puts her foot on it. FIONA I lied--at least I'm being honest about it. I believe in the benefits of religious conditioning. Now let that be a lesson in political strategy, my lovely little pumpkin pie. You’re unarmed now. Remember, dear, you can’t trust anyone, even your parents. It’s become a wilderness I’m afraid. DUDLEY I swallowed them for us. FIONA How self-less... and appropriate... (laughs) ...swallowed the keys of materialism. How metaphorical. (laughs hideously. Then viciously) I've had enough of this. Now, sit. Fiona pulls on the wire around Dudley's throat and he sits like a dog. FIONA That’s better. Bonnie Boo bursts into tears. FIONA Now we've got some control over the insanity. Or at the very least, we'll all go down with the ship together. I believe in family values. I believe in the power of love. I believe in credit when you're not in the collection department database. I believe in the melting pot. I want you both to know that I'm part of the team... DUDLEY (gasping) ...Which one...? FIONA ...Whichever one is winning... BONNIE BOO ...I caught the disease. They look up at her. They make eye contact for the first time. BONNIE BOO Worse than any disease ever known to mankind. Seems to break right in. Gets inside and becomes part of you. Eats you up from the inside out. And I'm infected. Deep down to the center of my bones. I'm trying to find a cure. That's all this is. That’s all it’s ever been. Please, stop that. Please, I need you to be healthy. I need you to help me get well. Lights lower on Fiona and Dudley, creating separation between them and Bonnie Boo who stands swaying like a five year old child, her arms wrapped around herself in a desperate hug. As the lonely light on her slowly begins to fade, she sings: BONNIE BOO (melodically) Mummy Duddy my family my family Do ya need me Do ya love me do ya want me to be clean Mummy Duddy my family my family do ya need me do ya love me then lick your blood offa me lick your blood offa me an' give me back my purity. Lights begin to fade on Fiona and Dudley and linger on Bonnie Boo swaying. BONNIE BOO (continuing the song) Give me back my purity... Give me back my purity... Give me back my purity... Give me back my purity... The lonely light on her fades to black. Jungle Music begins and will play throughout the intermission. End of Act One ACT TWO Scene One (He Arrives) The Jungle Music that was playing during the intermission fades out. The lights come up on Bonnie Boo, now in a white nightgown, her arms and legs bare and patched up with white, clean gauze bandages. She is laying on the couch, feet up on a foot rest, sipping tea. She sips, sighs, sips, sighs, sips sighs. Fiona sits next to her, spoon in hand filled with porridge, pink bowl in the other hand. Dudley is handcuffed to a chair with wooden arms. He watches Fiona feed Bonnie Boo. FIONA (to Bonnie Boo) And the airplane is coming in for a nice big landing... and as it approaches the big hanger we open our... BONNIE BOO ...I TOLD YOU TO GET THAT PORRIDGE SHIT AWAY FROM ME IT'S THE WRONG FOOD. WHAT DO YOU THINK THIS IS "LEAVE IT TO BEAVER", "THE WALTONS ON THEIR LITTLE STUPID MOUNTAIN AND I'M JOHN-BOY MR. DO-GOODY"? THIS IS MORE LIKE "LITTLE FUCKING HOUSE ON THE FUCKING PRAIRIE THAT'S BECOME A FUCKING WHOREHOUSE IN THE FUCKING DRUG WARD WATCHING THE FUCKING BRADY BUNCH ON FUCKING ACID"!!! IT'S NOT "PRETEND IT'S ALL OKAY SO LONG AS MY HAIR'S DONE"! OKAY? DID YOU HEAR THAT? NOW GET THAT SHIT AWAY FROM ME- -I'M NOT A T.V. GODAMNIT. Jesus why do I have to yell to make my point? Pause. They look at one another. FIONA Want me to read you a bed-time story? BONNIE BOO AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!! FIONA I only asked a question for Chrissakes. BONNIE BOO (tiring quickly) You're like talking to cement, you know that? Mummy, look at me. I'm not Snow White. I'm Andy Devine wearing a wonder bra. I'm Bob Dole without his War Myth and his Dilettante wife smiling when she's got indigestion of her life. I'm Nancy Regan shouting in the Ghetto's "Just Say No, and telling all the down-and-outters when you're feelin' low just take out your Amex Platinum and Eat at the Russian Tea Room! Get the pix?! I’m sick and I need to be cured. I need to find peace. I can’t fight anymore. I can’t fight....You think you can feed me porridge in a little pink bowl and hope all your fucked up sins will vanish, and I'll be you're little baby girl again? FIONA ...Yes... BONNIE BOO AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH... Bonnie Boo falls unconscious. FIONA Suit yourself. You don't want the fucking porridge, so be it, you little ungrateful bitch. Fiona throws the porridge against the rear wall, and it splatters waking Dudley but not Bonnie Boo. DUDLEY (waking) MOI? MOI? I’LL PAY. I’LL PAY DON’T HURT ME!!!. FIONA They're late again. What do they think I have, the rest of my life to be confiscated and evicted? DUDLEY Release me? FIONA No. DUDLEY I promise I'll be good. FIONA You're male. Belligerence is in your testes. There's no hope for mankind unless all the men become women. DUDLEY I don’t deserve this pain. Will you please find your reason and release me. We’re a family. This is not familial. There is a polite and friendly knock at the door. They freeze and look at the door terrified. DUDLEY I can’t take any more punishment. FIONA You’re not being punished. You’re being controlled because you're dangerous. Let you loose and you start eating everything of value in sight. Another knock, louder. FIONA (terrified) It's them! The door breaks down and Fiona spontaneously puts on a huge, fake smile and poses as the ingenue she once was. Mr. Carnaro comes flying through the door--he’s knocked it open shoulder first flying almost into Fiona. He stops nose to her nose. Smiles. Sees Dudley, straightens himself, pushes his own disheveled hair neatly into place, and straightens his jacket and tie. Mr. Carnaro is middle aged with grey beginning to seep into his dark hair. He wears an expensive business suit, shining horned rimmed glasses, polished leather shoes, carries a briefcase and has a small circular bone in his nose. He grabs Fiona by the waist, she smiles, and he seductively flirts with her. FIONA (sexy) So glad you could stop by. MR. CARNARO (to Fiona) Hi there, Fiona. (Giggles. To Dudley) Hello, Dudley. FIONA Our imported door made of wood from the Brazilian Rain Forest. Oooooooo you're so modern and powerful. Like a bulldozer gone mad. It turns me on. (giggles) MR. CARNARO I'm a piece of Americana, without the "cana"... And I've been told "I'm so sexy"... FIONA ...In that "Milken" sort of way... MR. CARNARO ...Or Bundy... FIONA ...Or Manson the Master... MR. CARNARO ...We're on a roll again, baby... don't stop now humor's all I have left... FIONA ...I have to, Dudley's giving me a dirty look. Pause. MR. CARNARO We'll fix the door before we put it on the market. (tight nervous laugh) I'm sorry I'm a bit late... my car... well, you know how it is with machines, never can trust them... like women. Right Fiona? (laughs) Fiona joins him laughing. MR. CARNARO Just a little jab in the arm sort of Male Chauvinist Pig ice breaker. So... how are you today? DUDLEY Release me? MR. CARNARO But why? You look... secured! In your place. Enjoy it silly... We sacrifice our lives to be secure and it seems someone's done all the work for you... (laughs) In these types of situations we're prepared for all kinds of unexpected behavior. Fiona, did you do this to poor wittle Dudley? FIONA Yes. I tied him so he wouldn't eat the house and everything in it. Mr. Carnaro laughs. Fiona giggles and snuggles up to him. DUDLEY I'd like to feel freedom. I should at least be able to feel that while you evict us, shouldn't I? MR. CARNARO Freedom? Freedom. Hmmm. That word rings a bell. (laughs, jabs Dudley in the arm) ...You look like you're just about ready for the sado masochistic time of your life. Where are the whips, Mums? FIONA (Fiona laughs along) A drink? MR. CARNARO Yes, please. It's very... Western of us. This kind of courtesy visit doesn't happen in underdeveloped countries. You’d just be killed right away. Here, we let the punishment linnnnnnnger in a more civilized manner. DUDLEY How domestic. FIONA Some Caviar? MR. CARNARO No, thank you. FIONA Cigar? Tiparillo? Cocaine? MR. CARNARO Don't snort--this bone in my nose is in the way. Remember, we're not in an under developed country. We're in an over developed land of opportunity--at your own risk... and you've lost I'm afraid. Big time. (laughs) FIONA Hors' Doeurves? I'll call the maid. DUDLEY We don't have a maid... FIONA ...Don't interrup... DUDLEY ...Will you get off your delusi... MR. CARNARO ...No no Fiona, thank you. FIONA We mean to be hospitable. MR. CARNARO We do, too. We want you to feel good. About everything. Feel good, or, just look good--whatever works is fine with us. We want you to think of us as family, or a neighbor perhaps--just a good neighbor, the good hands people... Think of us as... a slogan. FIONA How Madison Avenue. MR. CARNARO We try. Besides, it's just downright polite, to be polite. Fiona hands Mr. Carnaro his drink. FIONA Polite eviction? MR. CARNARO Humorous eviction... FIONA So Western, Mr. Carnaro. So very, very western. Want to see our new bed? Come. MR. CARNARO Maybe later, Fiona. I just got laid at the last visit. A threesome. I'm all "group sexed out". But I still foreclosed. Fiona cracks up hysterically. They all stop and watch her. DUDLEY WHAT IS IT FOR CHRISSAKES? FIONA ...An... Orgyyyyyy... Joke... "group sexed out"... (cracking up) Oh, Mr. Carnaro, how witty. I’ve never heard anything quite so fun... nyyyyyyyyyyy oh my my my. MR. CARNARO (gleefully) ...And a “joke” it was... I don't really get fucked on the job. In fact, it's the other way around. Refill please. Fiona still laughing gets him a refill. FIONA (baby talk) You know, Mr. Carnaro, we're friends with anyone who was anyone. And, they're very upset with your bank for foreclosing. MR. CARNARO It's a painful thing... and I know what you're thinking... it must be easy for Mr. Carnaro to evict us, take everything we own, and then to a nice hot, home cooked meal--but it's not--my wife can’t cook! (cracks up) Sort of a Youngman, quickie! I used to cry. Well, not cry really. Men don't actually cry. I sort of... felt real bad. But it didn't interfere with my sex life--you can bet your Long Dong Silver on that. (Laughs) Fiona joins in, laughing hard. MR. CARNARO (laughs) Just a little twentieth century womanizing sexual harassment teaser there--hope you appreciated it. (laughs) FIONA Oh we did we did. Right Dudley? Fiona laughs. Dudley just stares. MR. CARNARO (a joke) ...In fact, I used to feel as though I was part of some... fascist organization rationalizing a neo-supremacist ideology at the expense of my fellow brothers and sisters. They continue the fake laughter. MR. CARNARO (a joke) But, as time went on, I gradually began to see that if I didn't think about all that, it works out for the best. Especially for me... (laughs) Just a little self-absorption tagger there. FIONA (coming off her laughter) ...Such a murderous tease. MR. CARNARO They call me "the killer" at the office. (laughs) FIONA (smiling) Oh, you are. Such a talent for death. MR. CARNARO Practice makes perfect. DUDLEY (on the verge of tears and terrified) ...Please untie m... FIONA (to Dudley) ...OH SHUT UP! Why can't people just accept suffering and leave me alone. (to Mr. Carnaro) You're very handsome. Did anyone ever tell you that? MR. CARNARO Of course--I have power. People do anything to be associated with me, Fi-Fi. (smiles) Dudley, like a trapped animal, begins pulling at his cuffs attached to the chair. MR. CARNARO ...You get used to this job, like bloody-as-hell surgery day after day, dissecting the body, cutting everything apart. Messy work, very messy work--but someone has to do it and why not me, right? FIONA You'd make a brilliant butcher... MR. CARNARO ...Cutting edge... FIONA ...Such a penchant for blood... MR. CARNARO ...Fluidity... FIONA ...So Hollywood-ish. MMMMM... MR. CARNARO ...I know. And whenever I feel a bit tense about all that violence--there's always... Ovaltine, right? (laughs) Fiona cracks up. Dudley pulls desperately but can’t budge. FIONA (hysterically laughing) Oh Mr. Carnaro... you missed your calling... Stand up... You should have been a stand-up... Don’t forget all us “little people” when your on the top. MR. CARNARO I’m already on top. (laughs) FIONA I like men on top. (laughing) MR. CARNARO (laughing) Me too... They wait for Dudley to laugh. He doesn’t. MR. CARNARO I'll get a chuckle outta you yet, Dudley. I've got more jokes than Hitler had Jews... Mr. Carnaro cracks up again. Fiona joins in. FIONA Hitler! (She can’t breathe) Oh... I wish I had met you when wasn’t worn out. What a kidder.... Hitler... (Laughs) DUDLEY HITLER ISN’T FUNNY! MR. CARNARO Oh come now, I'm not really anti-Semitic... I love money... (to Dudley) No wonder you’re tied down... you have no sense of humor. Oh, look Duds, I know what you're going through. I've been there... well, not really. But I wouldn't want to have my personal possessions taken away from me either--why, it's all I am and less. It should be considered Fascist. It should be outlawed. Buuuuuuut... it's not. And unfortunately for you, they want the house, the car, the toaster, the underwear, the children... BONNIE BOO (waking) SALVATION! Bonnie Boo gasps. Mr. Carnaro is a bit shocked. MR. CARNARO You scared me little lady. My heart actually felt alive for a second. BONNIE BOO (dazed) Bad dream. I'm trembling... Hold me, Mummy? Duddy? FIONA Not now. I'm in the middle of something tragically important. DUDLEY All right, leave me handcuffed. But please, Mr. Carnaro, let's discuss business? MR. CARNARO I'm afraid it's too late for that. DUDLEY I have one last idea that might help us both work this out. MR. CARNARO We wish. DUDLEY Plea... MR. CARNARO ...Do you have the cash? DUDLEY Not yet... MR. CARNARO ...Then it's a done deal, Duds. Oooo... a rhyme sort of-- wasn't' that cute? FIONA (laughing, strokes Mr. Carnaro's arm) “Done Deal”, how literate. You’re good with words. MR. CARNARO I know. FIONA So “University”... MR. CARNARO ...Dean’s List... FIONA ...You belong there... BONNIE BOO ...Are you the banker? MR. CARNARO (almost baby talk) Yes. And you? FIONA How about some nice Snake? MR. CARNARO I'll just take the house and be off. Thanks, Fi. FIONA Is there anything I can do to help you destroy our lives, personally? MR. CARNARO No no, Fi-Fi, I can handle it. I'm a professional. But it was polite of you to ask. Those things matter. FIONA (coming on to him) I'm Nevus-Riche and desperate. So... if you need anything let me know, won’t you? Fiona moves to the bar. She drinks and watches carefully. MR. CARNARO I promise. BONNIE BOO Your late. MR. CARNARO I apologize--am I forgiven? BONNIE BOO Yeah. MR. CARNARO (to Bonnie Boo) I thought you were a collection agent--and forgot your bullet proof! (laughs) I love the earrings. (pulls a chart out of his briefcase) Did you charge them? Take out a loan with us? BONNIE BOO No. These are mine. Mr. Carnaro looks over his chart. MR. CARNARO No earrings here. You can hold onto them, they certainly have a grip on you... BONNIE BOO ...It was just a phase. Each one has a special meaning to me. MR. CARNARO I know how one gets attached. This bone in my nose is something I’ve always cherished--I got it when I was studying for my doctorate in archeology in New Guinea--I never finished. FIONA We're not going to be homeless, are we Mr. Carnaro my darling? DUDLEY WE'RE GOING TO BE HOMELESS. UNCUFF ME YOU... FIONA ...I WAS SPEAK... DUDLEY ...HE'S INDIFFERENT, CAN'T YOU SEE THA... FIONA ...SHUT UP... WHY DON'T YOU CALL OUR LAWYER FOR GOD'S SAKE? DUDLEY HE WON'T DEFEND US. WE'RE BROKE! YOU THINK JUSTICE IS FREE?! Dudley pulls violently and rips the chair handles off the chair. He rises, the wood arm rests dangling from his wrists and cuffs. DUDLEY I DEMAND A MEETING! MR. CARNARO (to Dudley) I love to see it--the quest for freedom. DUDLEY We need to talk... MR. CARNARO ...The indestructible human spirit overcoming the human condition at all costs... DUDLEY ...Right now... MR. CARNARO ...Super human will... DUDLEY ...Please..? MR. CARNARO ...So Arnold Swartzenaga... DUDLEY ...Sir.... MR. CARNARO ...Touch of the Stallone, hm? Very well done, Dudley. You know "your film" don’t you... DUDLEY ...You're not listening to me... MR. CARNARO ...I know what you're going to say, Dudley, I've heard it before: "How sad. What a shame... And, it's true. It is a shame. I realized that archeology was what I wanted to do. Being on a dig, was... oh how can one describe it... Like stalking a gazelle, and with a bow and arrow, hit it in it's heart and then watch it's eyes, go dead. (smiles) But... there's no money in archeology. FIONA How bourgeois... DUDLEY (to Mr. Carnaro) ...Will you please talk to ME about this... MR. CARNARO ...Don't misunderstand me, I'm happy about the choice to go completely against my inner desires... DUDLEY ...Not your lost career... MR. CARNARO ...Noooooooooooooooooo biggy. DUDLEY JESUS... MR. CARNARO I make great bucks, got two great "off-spring", a shrink all picked out for when they begin to realize what’s really going on, a huge home, two new landrovers--different colors to match the house and yard, lots of vacation time, and my pensions just building and building--never pay the dentist or the Doc. No sirree Mengele! DUDLEY I'M BEGGING YOU FOR CHRISSAKES. FIONA Oh I love Mengele. Such an exquisite painter... Wasn’t he an expressionist? DUDLEY ...He wasn't a paint... FIONA ...Let me handle thi... DUDLEY ...you sound ridiculou... FIONA ...Mengele, Mr. Carnaro..? MR. CARNARO ... I've got a great... existence situation. (growing frustration and anger) The hell with all... that... (angry self-disgust) ...meaningful Mythology--That's what I say to-- Arch-e-ol-o- gee. My motto? "So long as I'm paid, I'm happy." But I'm still a student of the aboriginal experience. Sort of a hobby you might say. Dudley exits. FIONA Don’t you leave me with those keys still in your colon! HOLD ON MISTER!!! Fiona follows. Mr. Carnaro stops and looks at Bonnie Boo, who is smiling at him. He moves to her on the couch. MR. CARNARO (notices they've left, smiles and turns to Bonnie Boo. Flirtatiously) You see, Bonnie Boo, I picked up this nose bone in a little shop in a Pigmy town in Uganda one fine Spring morning. We had just shot an elephant for it's tusks (and had to rip them out bare handed because the stupid Pigmy help forgot the electric elephant tusk removers), when I saw this nose bone store--and to my surprise when the nose bone installer put it in my nose in the mall, my sinusitis cleared up. (breathes in deeply through his nose) And it makes things interesting for my beloved clientele-- breaks the stereotype--you could say I'm an ab-original. You bet your Nixon I am. (laughs. Pause) BONNIE BOO I'm sick. I need to be cured of my life. MR. CARNARO Tried drugs? Bonnie Boo nods. MR. CARNARO Poetry? Bonnie Boo nods. MR. CARNARO Delusion? Bonnie Boo nods. MR. CARNARO (shaking his head) Hmmmm. He begins checking things off and looking closely at each item. Bonnie Boo begins to cry. MR. CARNARO Desperate? Not feeling well? BONNIE BOO (angrily) No I don't feel well. I’m direction-less. MR. CARNARO Rebellious, hmmm? We'll fix that. BONNIE BOO Sorry. MR. CARNARO (baby talk) You don't want to be a baby anymore do you? BONNIE BOO No. I want to grow up and be a part of something that won't kill me in the process. He looks at her. Smiles. Moves closer. MR. CARNARO What about just being a part of “something”? BONNIE BOO Would it be better than this? MR. CARNARO It would BE this. But with lots of decorations--and no bandages. He looks at her and she at him. BONNIE BOO Why are you looking at me like that? Moves closer. Smiles. MR. CARNARO We all die you know. Some after they live, some while they’re living. The cure won't feel like it's killing you. In fact, as you die, you'll be rewarded and feel... loved. Is that what you want? BONNIE BOO You don't know how much I want to feel loved. Moves closer still. His face is almost in her neck. She is aroused. MR. CARNARO Then we'll see to it that you feel loved. A book will help you escape the pain of innocence and idealism. A coming of age story. Wouldn’t that be nice? Mr. Carnaro looks at her. BONNIE BOO Don't look at me like that, it gives me the creeps. MR. CARNARO (still looking) It could solve all your problems. Would you like to read it? BONNIE BOO (she can't look away) Will it give me stability? MR. CARNARO And much, much more. Mr. Carnaro's mouth is almost touching her neck. She groans quietly, her head falls back. BONNIE BOO More? MR. CARNARO It will give you many, many things. You’ll need this. Tugs the bone in his nose. Then he looks at her intensely. Bonnie Boo is mesmerized. MR. CARNARO (ceremoniously, like a religious chant) I'm taking the bone out of my nose... (speaks) ...and placing it in yours. Bonnie Boo signs and smiles as it is placed in her nose. BONNIE BOO I feel tingly all over. Jungle Music gently begins to play under: MR. CARNARO Good. And it fits you perfectly. If you do well, I'll let you keep it. BONNIE BOO Really? MR. CARNARO We need you Boo-Boo. To keep things going. Now, for "The Book". Mr. Carnaro removes a small RED book from his briefcase and graciously hands it to Bonnie Boo. She takes it cautiously, opens it, and begins to read. Mr. Carnaro looks at her and smiles. Lights slowly fade out. Jungle Music remains playing into the next scene. End of Act Two Scene One ACT TWO Scene Two (The Cure) Jungle Music fades out as the lights rise on Fiona who is standing downstage center holding the two sets of keys to the Jaguar dangling from one finger, almost as if it were a drink. She gazes out over the audience. Bonnie Boo is now sprawled out on the floor in her beige underwear intensely reading the red book Mr. Carnaro gave her. Mr. Carnaro continues to pack items. Dudley watches him with growing frustration. MR. CARNARO The keys won’t work. We locked the steering wheel--with The Club! Fiona gasps and drops the keys. DUDLEY (politely approaching) We need to get our feet back on the ship, and sail away with you. FIONA We're part of your community. DUDLEY There's got to be another solution. We're a loving, American family. BONNIE BOO Like the Kennedy’s. FIONA SHUT UP BEFORE I SLIT YOUR THROAT. BONNIE BOO YOU TRY IT MISS BREAST IMPLANT CITY... DUDLEY DON'T YOU SPEAK TO YOUR MOTHER LIKE THA... BONNIE BOO ...MISS LIPO-SUCKAHOLIC TUMMY--ASS--EYELID--NOSTRIL--EARLOBE-- THREE MINUTE TUSH MANIAC... FIONA (catches herself) I'LL KILL YOU I'LL KILL YOU--YOU SELF-DESTRUCTIVE INCOMPETENT, LEACHING MISERABLE SELF-PITYING DISRESPECTFUL PROFANE WHORE... (giggles. To Mr. Carnaro) It just slipped out--I didn’t mean any of that. It's all this confiscation. MR. CARNARO (Simply, while packing objects) ...I understand how you feel. Like they say... "Shit Happens". And sometimes we're just victims caught in the middle of a biblical misinterpretation--something like that. Take me for instance. I feel like I'm all caught up in all these superficial and potentially destructive actions. As if my choice is controlled by outside choices invisible to the actions taking place right here, right now. I'll show you what I mean. As I place these valuables into their appropriate boxes, it's as if , I, weren't really doing it, but rather a force bigger than I were in control. It somehow has control of my body, and my mind, even though a part of my mind rebels, even finds it gratuitous, as I fulfill the action. (to Bonnie Boo) It's a good read isn't it? BONNIE BOO Yes. (Reads quickly) The process of becoming is the process of absorption. The process of absorption is the process of repetition. Regurgitating mundane information to burnt out academics is the key to graduating in four years or less with a higher grade point average. Shoving down throats and spitting up is essentially how we educate our young. Remember, in the end, the grade, and the piece of paper, is all that matters. Mr. Carnaro picks up two beautiful gold candle holders. MR. CARNARO Gold plated? FIONA YES. MR. CARNARO Oooooo Dellish! (packs them) FIONA You can't just put my life in a box like that. MR. CARNARO Is it upsetting you? FIONA YES, IT'S DEVASTATING. MR. CARNARO Would you like some prosaic? FIONA No. MR. CARNARO Then what is your problem? FIONA WHAT IS MY PROBLEM? WHAT IS YOUR PROBLEM? MR. CARNARO I wrapped it first. In The Times. Not the Inquirer or second rate newswrap. Besides, these material objects are really useless. Ignore them. Don't be upset. It's only your whole life! (sardonic giggle) FIONA You are going to leave us bereft. MR. CARNARO Ber... FIONA BEREFT! MR. CARNARO Ber... FIONA ...FUCKING BEREFT!!! BEREFT...!!! MR. CARNARO ...eft? Word sounds familiar. FIONA DESTITUTE. HUMILIATED. RUINED. DEAD! MR. CARNARO Hmmm... they all sound familiar. Just can't associate them with anything that has to do with ME? (chuckles) Dudley lights a joint. Bonnie Boo gets out of bed and exits. DUDLEY Fuck this shit. I'm buzzin' out. That sounded familiar. (takes a toke) Now that... feels better. That... makes all this seem tolerable. Want a toke, Mums? FIONA Oh please, we've matured beyond that nonsense. I'm not going to pot. DUDLEY Yes we are an' baby, it beats this disaster goin' down. Come on lover. Lay low. Come play. (takes a toke, chokes) Mr. Carnaro packs ravenously. Fiona looks out at the lawn. FIONA It wasn’t me. I WANT YOU ALLLLLLLL TO KNOW THAT. I shared my wealth with the nail salon, and the landscapers, the waiters, and the little over priced proprietorships in town. I was and am a miserably unfulfilled human being. But I didn't complain. I wasn't unhappy about it. In fact I felt satisfied to just have myself redone weekly, go to detention or jail or the hospital to visit Bonnie Boo, take drives in Jaggy and wait for you to come home from the office to bore me to death! It was enough for me. But not for you! DUDLEY To each his own, baby. Mr. Carnaro packs. FIONA ...We could have been happy in our misery together. We had all this. It was an adequate diversion from the truth. It kept our minds off of ourselves. DUDLEY (sings) Up up and away in my beautiful my beautiful ballooooooooooooooooooooooon... Mr. Carnaro finds a beautiful, small lamp. Dudley sees him and snaps out of his high immediately. DUDLEY No. Please, Mr. Carnaro, not that. That was the lamp I bought while I was on business in Germany. My first major deal that catapulted my company into the Fortune Five. It's made of pure lambs skin. Well, some type of skin. I bought it in a lovely little German antique shop. The shop keeper said it was manufactured as a limited edition during World War Two--you remember World War Two, don't you? Some sort of experiment of some kind. You mustn't take it. MR. CARNARO (stroking the shade) It has a texture I've never felt before. So unique. So soft. Like... baby’s skin... DUDLEY Yes I know. Soft as a baby’s skin, isn't it? It’s very rare. A collectors item. Please don’t take it... Please? MR. CARNARO It’s an unbelievable feeling. Oh, how lovely. I'll leave it right here. Until last. Mr. Carnaro strokes the lamp shade again and smiles in ecstasy. He then places the lamp where it is clearly visible for the rest of the play. DUDLEY I saved a tab of acid. Do you remember where I put it Mums? FIONA NO. Dudley searches for his LSD. Bonnie Boo enters dragging a large bucket with branches sticking out of it. She is wearing only her beige underwear. From the bucket, she smears mud on her face, belly, arms and legs, until she is covered in it, as: FIONA (to Bonnie Boo) You're making a mess. DUDLEY All right Boo Boo... make yourself a canvas... a testament to life itself. Right ON! Where’d I put it? Where’d I put it? (sings) "LSD will help me see, LSD for you an' me". You remember that song? Dudley continues searching for his LSD, as: FIONA (to Mr. Carnaro) You stand there like some all knowing God. Insolent. self- righteous. Can't you see what you're doing? MR. CARNARO (looks around smiling) You can write to the complaint department. I’m required to inform you of their address. Here it is. (takes out a small envelope and hands it to her) You have any problem with it, call them. FIONA You're killing us systematically. MR. CARNARO Not me, Fiona, the bank. I’m just going to leave you. You see the separation? I’m innocent of those types of accusations. It's the bank. FIONA The bank. The bank. Where are they? MR. CARNARO Where you can’t see them? FIONA Right. I see you. You! MR. CARNARO But it’s not me that’s doing this. It’s them. FIONA But you are the one here. YOU. MR. CARNARO NO. I’m not responsible. You are. THEY are. Not ME. I'M the victim here. FIONA But YOU are the one packing everything in those boxes. MR. CARNARO But I’M only doing what THEY pay me to do so it's not MY fault. FIONA YOU TAKE THEIR MONEY. MR. CARNARO Talk to THEM. Not Me. I'm not really here. They are really here. FIONA But they're not here. MR. CARNARO They are more here then you or I. FIONA Where are they--do you see them? No. You see me because I am here. You see you because you are here. MR. CARNARO Yes I am here but not in control. They are in every nook and cranny of this room, in all those boxes, in the clothes I'm wearing and the air we're breathing. FIONA Where? Where? Show me where? MR. CARNARO (pointing to his suit, the room the boxes) Here, and here and here and here and... FIONA ...You pointed to yourself. MR. CARNARO I did not. FIONA You did so I saw you. MR. CARNARO I pointed to my suit. FIONA But you are in your suit. MR. CARNARO Yes, but I am not my suit. FIONA I want to talk to THEM! MR. CARNARO You have to have an appointment. FIONA HOW DO I MAKE ONE? MR. CARNARO YOU HAVE TO SPEAK TO... (pause) ...MOI! (cracks up) FIONA AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! DUDLEY (finds LSD) FOUND THE SUCKER! Dudley pops the LSD into his mouth. Smiles. Bonnie Boo sees a paragraph in the book, then goes to a drawer and pulls out a finger painting kit and begins to paint her body. MR. CARNARO (to Bonnie Boo) It's begun. Thank God. Carnaro takes wine off a rack to pack it. FIONA My wine collection? My father gave that to me. BONNIE BOO (reading and painting her body) I celebrate my life. My body is a canvas. Bonnie Boo paints herself. Dudley pulls some old beads and a vest out of an old chest and puts them on, as: BONNIE BOO (reading) The stars, my mother. The sun, my mother. The earth, my mother. FIONA I... AM YOUR MOTHER YOU UNGRATEFUL LUNATIC. NINE HOURS OF LABOR FIFTEEN THOUSAND WONDROUS DOLLARS FOR THIS!--I want to die. Fiona fixes a drink. Trembling. BONNIE BOO I am one with you your body and mine are of the same soil the same water the same grass the same sun the same... FIONA ...BULLSHIT... Oh God I can’t believe this is happening to us. DUDLEY (strumming imaginary guitar) Sunshine on my shoulders makes me happy... FIONA I’m going out for a walk. This, is insanity. DUDLEY It’s dangerous. Out there. Stay in baby. We can share. FIONA It's just as dangerous in here. Besides, I need adventure and the televisions been repossessed. She exits. DUDLEY WAIT FOR ME. WE'VE GOT TO STAY TOGETHER. OUR COMMUNITY. Dudley exits. Mr. Carnaro takes two rattling instruments out of his briefcase and hands them to Bonnie Boo who immediately is mesmerized by them and almost unconsciously begins to create a primitive rhythm. Jungle Music begins to play underneath... She explores the instrument moving throughout the room. She develops a primitive dance with it as she reads from Mr. Carnaro’s book. BONNIE BOO (dancing) Nature is the source of all life, and we share nature with other creatures and cultures who we see as different, when they are essentially the same. Even lizards and spiders and lions and bears. MR. CARNARO It’s bigger than all of us Boo Boo. You’re beginning to understand, then? BONNIE BOO I think I’m beginning to get somewhere. This is making some kind of sense. I’m not sure exactly what, but I feel connected to something deep inside of me. Something old, ancient, that’s been there all the time. Something that’s been hidden for some reason. Dudley screams painfully offstage. MR. CARNARO Did you hear something? BONNIE BOO (while exploring the instrument and dancing) There's something about the woods, you go into them, breathe in, and all these mysteries and rhythms come up. Dudley bursts on-stage screaming--his pants are missing, his legs are badly scratched, black and blue and bleeding. DUDLEY (panting in fear) My God. I went out there and saw an animal eating another animal. He was chewing at his intestines, pulling them out of its body and swallowing them. Another came up and began knawing on the corpses bone, knawing and knawing. Another chewed on its face crushing its head. Then something attacked me. It had me by the legs. It pulled at me and I grabbed onto a tree and pulled my self away. I've been living here for twenty years. That's never happened before. MR. CARNARO You had a gardener. Bonnie Boo keeps chanting and dancing. DUDLEY I was trying to rescue your mother. My God. Come help me look for her. BONNIE BOO This feels nice. I want to stay here. Bonnie Boo dances. DUDLEY (to Bonnie Boo) What you’re doing may seem innocent enough. But what will happen when all that innocence grows up? When you have to pay a cover charge to dance? MR. CARNARO She'll graduate. (laughs) DUDLEY This isn’t a joke. What are you teaching her? She looks like some kind of primitive jungle woman. Where are my pants? I had a joint in my paints. (noticing his bare legs) My legs! (to Mr. Carnaro) You had something to do with this--I know it. Bonnie Boo begins to exit chanting. DUDLEY No. I won’t let you go out there. BONNIE BOO It’s calling me, I have to go. Don't you understand? DUDLEY NO! I want you to stay here. He tries to stop her, but she hits him with a tree branch. BONNIE BOO (backing toward the door) I’m sorry that wasn’t me. Just like that, you're somewhere else. Somewhere you've never actually been, but know intimately. Your mouth salivates. Your eyes squeeze together. Fear engulfs your heart with every unknown sound, smell, sight, touch you change. PROTECT. PROTECT. PROTECT. She runs out. Jungle Music stops. Dudley crosses to the window and peers out. DUDLEY She’s doing that dance on the front lawn. She's so expressive. So sensitive. I hope something doesn’t eat her. The LSD is taking effect. He laughs and starts beating on a stool. DUDLEY I used to love this stuff. Maybe that’s where I went wrong. I stopped tripping. I stopped long enough to look at what was really going on. Dudley watches Mr. Carnaro pack. He is growing higher by the second. They stare at one another. DUDLEY (stoned, staring at Carnaro in awe) ...Can’t be. But it is. Wow, man. It’s him. This is definitely cool shit, man. (stares at him in awe) Mr. George Washington himself! Fuckin’ ay. Hey, Georgy, did you sleep here, too? With who, man, one o' ya slaves child'n? All of ya slaves child'n. What vision you an’ all those other fore- thugs had man, into what people really needed. Thank you man. Thank you. (pause) Well then let me tell you, Georgy... about my downfall. See I loved bein’ a hippie. And I wanted to become a professional hippie. But... there wasn't any money in it. Dig? Dudley lights a joint and smokes. Crosses to him. Sits. They look at one another. Dudley with a silly smile on his face. DUDLEY So, man, I turned to the business world and became a Tarzan Tycoon swinging from the great Dow Jones. Attained that great office ever concocted by businessmen--I was a capitalist pig and proud of it! RIGHT ON BROTHER! There I was sittin’ in my plush, genuine, imported Tiger-Hide swivel chair with height, tilt, position and cushion-density controls... And I gazed out my office window... He moves to the window. DUDLEY ...And what did I see in that great big beautiful stone city, man? (he looks out) I saw--America, Georgey! LOOK! I SEE IT RIGHT NOW... Commere... Look. He takes Mr. Carnaro by the hand over to the window. He points out over the audience. Sees something horrific. Mr. Carnaro looks out, too, for the remainder of the monolouge, seeing his own life. He tries to mask his pain, but it is subtlely obvious. Dudley, finally, terrified at what he sees, screams. DUDLEY Oh my God. LOOK. It's a huge, massive asshole walking down Fifth Avenue to businesses of every shape and size. There are big ugly feet stepping over little homeless people living in Westinghouse and General Electric boxes... WATCH OUT LITTLE PEOPLE THE ASSHOLES ARE COMIN’! (sudden change, to Carnaro) An' I was one of them, pops... A proud asshole leadin' the march feelin' safe in the wake of their lies. The product of a country created on the backs of slaves preachin' the morality of brotherly love. And like me they were big--International Fortune Five BIG! It had all looked so good. From the outside. That's what I learned to look at. But in the end, I had this pain, Georgy. Right here. (points to his heart). My heart had been burnt, but I didn't know it yet. (pause. takes a toke and exhales) Money didn't work for me anymore. Swivel chairs didn't give me that narcissistic erection I had lived for...No, man... Instead, I was deeply unhappy... I had forgotton what it felt like to feel joy. Love. Innocence. Wonderment. My youth had withered in the war to survive. All I had really attained for my hard-earned-avoidance, was "misery" with a phony smile, marchin’ to an office that held up the meaning of my pathetic existence! Dudley points again and Mr. Carnaro looks out, heavy and weary eyed remembering. DUDLEY (suddenly flipping out) I HAD BEEN ABDUCTED. EVERYTHING HAD BECOME A FUTURE I COULDN’T POSSIBLY KNOW, BUT SOUGHT. (sudden realization) Then something terrifying happened. I remembered that I could love. I had before. It was inside of me, I thought. (growing sadness) But when I looked, it was only a word... an idea... The experience had been abducted, too... I couldn’t feel it in my heart anymore! (gently, sadly, knowingly) 'Cause the assholes were still walkin' down fifth avenue with slogans in their eyes, and money-killin' in their hearts, wallets full of plastic, their children lost and disillusioned, blindly steppin' right over miracles, hopin' for a real life as they marched in the cement jungle toward the future with an eye on obtaining more shit..! (lowering to his knees in prayer) I had come to realize, that I was stuck in a city of people who drank too much Kaopectate when they really needed MILK OF MAGNESIA! SEE WHAT THE FUCK I MEAN, MAN? LOOK AT THEM! LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOK!!! They both look out over the audience. DUDLEY (looking at the audience) That's my pain, man... I know it can change... On his knees in prayer. DUDLEY The possibility is in each and every person on this planet-- there are so many wondrous things, man--to be able to have compassion and love for others. To know it. To understand it. To have a thought. The gift of sight--bein' able to see beyond. It could be a world of harmony and peace... (hysterically trying to reach them) IF ONLY WE DRANK ABUNDANT MILK OF MAGNESIA AND EMPTIED OUR COLONS OF ALL OUR STUFF! Long pause. Dudley is so moved that he could sing the national anthem. MR. CARNARO I have to go to work and it sucks! Do you comprehend that, you mindless idiot? Every... day... AND IT SUCCCCCKS. Up at seven, on the train by eight, in the office by nine. I slug it out and live in a world of little pieces of paper, phones blastin' in my ear, commutes in metal cars on hard cement roads where one slip of the finger makes you mincemeat and no one can ever go fast enough... a world of ... bills, Dudley. Bills I have to pay. BIIILLLLLLLSSSS that have razor sharp edges to it and I'm not talking paper cut, I'm talking jugular. BILLLLLLLLLLSSSSSS THAT OWN ME FROM THE TIP OF MY TOES TO THE TOP OF MY HEAD WITH PREMATURE GRAY IN IT! I didn't make that system but I have to survive in it day in and DAY OUT, until one dark moment, you complete asshole, like every other shit head out there, I will drop dead and be buried in a box six feet under the ground to become a maggots breakfast, lunch and dinner! We made a business deal and I'm here to collect. If I don't, I lose. And I don't like losing. It hurts too much. So... if you wouldn't mind, Duds... Get off my back you flaming asshole... just... FUCK OFF. Pause. Mr. Carnaro and Dudley stare at one another. Dudley is coming out of his high and rises. Mr. Carnaro wipes his brow, then resumes packing. DUDLEY (weary) You're a Neanderthal in a business suit. MR. CARNARO Don't be so optimistic... (stands like a lizard flicks his tongue) ...I'm a lizard. (flicks his tongue, then delivers the following like TV commercials) And It's a twelve hundred dollar business suit. Two hundred dollar genuine silk tie, five hundred dollar gold watch, fog- free glasses and genuine Gucci’s all paid in FULL!!! (his own voice) Now, if you'll excuse me. I have to get back to the job I hate beyond comprehension, that I don't want to lose so I can eat, shit and be merry. (flicks his tongue at Dudley) Mr. Carnaro resumes packing. DUDLEY Perhaps it's too late for you. But the children. They're our only hope. Bonnie Boo is thrust into the room as if thrown by a huge force and dances violently. Jungle Music begins and is loud and passionate. Bonnie Boo is in conflict with her dance. She is wearing a primitive mask of war and the hunt that is frightening, primitive and grotesque. There are bones hanging from her waist which rattle as she moves or dances. She is very primitive now, a complete transformation into the human/beast who might have lived twenty thousand years ago. BONNIE BOO (pause) I'm... I feel like I’m... being... MR. CARNARO Possessed? BONNIE BOO Yes. DUDLEY TAKE OFF THAT MASK. MR. CARNARO (smiling) It’s too late. It's gone inside. DUDLEY DON’T LET HIM IN! Dudley moves to help Bonnie Boo. Mr. Carnaro hits Dudley hard with a tree branch and he falls hard. MR. CARNARO STAY OUT OF OUR WAY OR SHE'LL KILL YOU. DUDLEY YOU’RE TRANSFORMING MY BABY. BONNIE BOO (trying to pull the mask off of her) It won’t come off. This isn't right. I wanted to dance. I wanted to know something profound. Fiona Screams off stage. MR. CARNARO (still fighting with Dudley. To Bonnie Boo) You're progressing to the next step. That freedom stuff is only the foundation of your youth. Now, you’re an adult, Bonnie Boo. You're going through a rite of passage. Fiona screams off stage. Bonnie Boo's body is thrust wildly about as though she had no control over it convulsing into a more aggressive dance of primitive violence all over the stage. Mr. Carnaro and Dudley fight with the branches, Mr. Carnaro holding Dudley away from Bonnie Boo. BONNIE BOO Daddy, save me. Fiona screams. DUDLEY MY GOD WHAT’S HAPPENING TO HER. Bonnie Boo! Fiona?! Bonnie Boo dances, out of control. She moves to Dudley who tries to help her free herself from the dance, but she uncontrollably and violently hits him with her tree branch several times... Mr. Carnaro joins in and they both beat Dudley with their branch/clubs sending him flying onto the couch. When they part, Dudley's hair, face and neck are completely filled with blood. He sits unconscious with his arms and legs in an asymmetrical and pained position. Mr. Carnaro looks on laughingly and calmly. He tosses the branch off-stage. Bonnie Boo remains downstage panting in a violent huff, almost as if steam were coming out of her nose. MR. CARNARO Everything’s working out just as we planned. It’s nice to be on schedule. Fiona screams and is thrown in through the open window, landing on her back down stage center. She is wearing only beige panties and bra covered with mud, and her body is badly bruised, scratched and bleeding. Her hair is wild and falls over her face making her appear primitive. She tries to rise, but cannot. She watches Bonnie Boo in her struggle to free herself. Mr. Carnaro moves behind Bonnie Boo and cuddles her in his arms, swaying her from side to side seductively. MR. CARNARO (to Bonnie Boo) Soon, you'll feel completely normal again. You’ll feel as though you fit into something. That’s what you wanted, isn’t it? Stability? You have to evolve into it. Trust me, and you’ll eventually feel no pain, even when you inflict it on others, or yourself. (chuckles) Her movements and appearance grow more and more real as the costume becomes her. FIONA STOP IT. YOU CAN’T DO THIS TO HER. MR. CARNARO (to Bonnie Boo, VIOLENTLY) READ THE LAST PASSAGE--NOW! Bonnie Boo instantly snaps the book up standing between Dudley on the couch and Fiona sprawled out center stage on her back. BONNIE BOO (fast, stuttering, terrified) The most fundamental truth the successful individual has to master is the cut-throat manipulation of law and system to maintain power and control over others while creating the facade of a sophisticated and civilized human being. Jungle Music out. FIONA No. That’s not true Bonnie Boo. LET HER GO. MR. CARNARO (smiling) I’m not touching her. FIONA (trying to rise) She came out of me. MR. CARNARO She came out of the earth... she’s up for grabs. FIONA You’ve hypnotized her. I know who you are. I won't let you do this. Dudley? Dudley remains unconscious. MR. CARNARO She’s growing up. I have nothing to do with that, Fiona. FIONA (to Bonnie Boo) Come here and take off that mask. It’s horrid. Bonnie Boo remains downstage huffing. FIONA Why won’t you come? Fiona rises slowly. Her legs are weak. She reaches out toward Bonnie Boo at the other end of the stage. FIONA Come to me. We have to help one another. We’re a family. Mr. Carnaro rolls the first of the three separate white walls off-stage. Bonnie Boo looks out into the abyss of the Theatre. Fiona walks toward Bonnie Boo like a two year old, learning to walk. Her legs are extremely weak. FIONA (to Bonnie Boo) In the woods, I could smell my mother's womb. I felt myself being born, again. Within a silence so quiet that it spoke of eternity; the eternity in me, in this new, little body. I grew older... Bonnie Boo touches her own face/mask, and body. Fiona continues taking baby steps toward Bonnie Boo. FIONA ...and in each age, I saw this change; my eyes, my face, my body, evolving into something else, my entire body transformed and grew so beautifully, life radiated in my face, behind my eyes, my skin, everywhere... there was life, breathing, and I kept changing... Mr. Carnaro enters and rolls the second wall off. FIONA (to Bonnie Boo) And suddenly, I felt your life growing inside of me and I loved you. Like a breath, there you were, wrapped in white blankets, as beautiful as an angel. There was such innocence in your eyes. And I wanted you to grow up, and never lose it. As I was just beginning to lose mine. I was young and pretty. Your father was lean and beautiful. We were like the trees. Like the flowers in the fields. Like the music. He would hold me in his arms on the beach, and kiss me. We were so... clean... inside. (pause) But the rigidity and violence outside was too strong and too frightening. We felt trapped, and wanted to feel alive. So we began to fit in. It started as a little thing. A thought... "if only we could have some more money". "A bigger place"... MR. CARNARO (off-stage, yelling) BONNIE BOO? THE BOXES PLEASE? Fiona is just about to touch Bonnie Boo who turns quickly and begins to push the boxes off one by one until they’re all off stage. Fiona talks more to herself now. FIONA ...a toaster oven. A new rug. A home. A bigger home. A mink. A Jaguar... if only we could have these things, the rigidity wouldn't seem so unbearable. The pain, would disappear. So, each day we'd place ourselves inside our possessions and give up a little piece of our freedom. A little speck of our joy. A tiny droplet of our love. We began sacrificing such a little piece each time, it was almost unnoticeable. Until finally, our humanity had been all packed away. Confiscated. Each day became a justification of our entrapment; decorating the outside until the inside had become twisted, and horrible and lonely and so beat up, it wasn't recognizable anymore... Bonnie Boo enters and looks out into the abyss. Silence. FIONA I want my baby back. I want my baby to let me hold her in my arms and protect her, and nourish her, and smile on her. (almost weeping) I want my baby... back. Mr. Carnaro enters. MR. CARNARO Just one more to go, then we can call it a day. Nice work Bonnie Boo. Thank you. Mr. Carnaro hands her a twenty. Bonnie Boo grunts, “thank you”. MR. CARNARO (to Bonnie Boo) Could you remove him from the couch, please. I want it. Oh, and take the shirt off his back. Mr. Carnaro rolls the last wall off. Bonnie Boo rips the shirt off Dudley’s back. Under it, like his legs, his body is badly bruised, scratched and bleeding. He wears only his boxer shorts, socks and shoes. His face and neck are caked with blood. We can see the whites of his eyes. Mr. Carnaro enters smiling. FIONA What’s happened to me? MR. CARNARO (chuckling) The decorations were removed. FIONA What’s happening to us? MR. CARNARO Your insides are on the outside, that's all. I need the couch. It's the last item. Bonnie Boo? Bonnie Boo pushes hard and rolls Dudley off who falls, rolling onto his back downstage center, like a corpse. Mr. Carnaro hands Bonnie Boo a crisp hundred. Bonnie Boo grunts, “thank you”. MR. CARNARO There’s more where that came from. (Chuckles) Mr. Carnaro rolls the couch off. Dudley wakes, terrified and wobbles to his feet trying to pull himself together. But he is too beat up. He stands slumped, like a Neanderthal man. He too, tries to walk, but can only take baby steps. Silence. Stillness. FIONA (NOT looking at Dudley, in a very distant tone) I want to go away. Like our honeymoon--the sun, do you remember it? We must go somewhere restful. Where peace can saturate our bodies. Perhaps... Nirvana? Would you like to go to Nirvana with me? Dudley tries to answer, but words won’t come out--only exhausted, primitive grunts. All the furnishings are gone leaving the stage barren--except for the lamp. Mr. Carnaro enters whistling. MR. CARNARO Well, that does it. It's been a pleasure. You know, you can't borrow a life. Even if you have no other choice but to build one on credit. (laughs) Nice little bureaucratic political corruption riddle there. He takes out a huge wad of new, crisp hundreds and fans it. MR. CARNARO Bonnie Boo, you've got the basic idea. Need a little cleaning up, some new clothes and a make-over, but with a little work you’ll be one of us. I can promise you a lucrative future if you come with me. Bonnie Boo crosses to Mr. Carnaro and stands next to him. They are center of Fiona and Dudley standing stage right and left and who look away from one another. Mr. Carnaro hands her one half of the money wad. She holds it up with both hands above her head ceremoniously. She looks at it glowing in the light. Mr. Carnaro notices something. MR. CARNARO Almost forgot--that soft, beautiful lamp. I think I’ll keep that piece for myself. It’ll go perfectly on my desk. He touches the lampshade running his hand up and down the shade smiling with delight. He turns and begins to exit, whistling, Bonnie Boo following, copying his whistle and walk identically. There is a long pause. Fiona stands slumped and beat up, just like Dudley. They look off in opposite directions. Stillness. FIONA ...The sun kept shining. Remember? Behind us, brighter and more beautiful than anything we’d ever seen. Behind them, magenta light begins to slowly glow until it is intensely bright. Jungle sounds and music will grow with the light and exist ever so slightly behind them. The magenta light leaves them in black silhouette, just traces of light caressing their faces--like two primitive people thousands of years ago in a deep jungle. FIONA (slowly, exhausted) ...it rose up blazing with wondrous life and lit the water and we came upon the land from our swim and walked the Earth we looked upon the landscape majestic beauty glowing in its bounty... (pause) ...and we tried... to own it. (pause) We... forgot... about... the sun. Gentle light on them fades leaving them in a black silhouette. Tableau. The magenta light and music very slowly fade to black. The End